“If everyone is moving forward together, then success takes care of itself.”
~ Henry Ford
Client Paul asks: One of my coworkers recently told me I’m hard to approach at work. It felt like kind of a blow, since I’ve always thought of myself as being a nice person. How can I change this impression my coworkers have of me?
Coach Joel answers: Paul, developing good relationships is a key part of succeeding at work, yet it’s often neglected. Do you ever have days where you keep your nose to the grindstone, churning out work—and feel like slamming shut your door on anyone who dares interrupt? This kind of attitude actually hurts your own productivity as well as your organization’s. Building good working relationships will help you become a more effective leader, boost your chances of promotion, enhance teamwork, and make you a happier person. These 4 daily habits will help you get there.
1. Communicate clear goals and expectations.
When you communicate clearly—and follow through—you show you’re a trustworthy person. Set clear goals and benchmarks for what you’ll accomplish in projects and your overall job performance, and help those you supervise to do the same. Choose the best medium for your communications, too. If sharing a complicated list of instructions, share it by email or as a hard copy in addition to going over it in person.
2. Share appreciation for others.
Noticing others’ contributions, large or small, will give them a more positive image of you. If others are feeling constantly judged or critiqued, it will be difficult for them to engage in creative, collaborative thinking with you. Knowing they are valued will help them share ideas more freely. Sharing your appreciation also conveys a positive attitude, which exudes confidence in your team.
3. Spend one-on-one time with team members.
Getting to know coworkers will help you develop good relationships at work. The one-on-one time also promotes openness and collaboration. Go to lunch with someone from a different department, who might have skills that will be useful for a future project. Have coffee with a coworker you haven’t developed a rapport with, and find out what you have in common. Just knowing you care enough to make this time will help break the ice.
4. Address interpersonal problems directly.
If tension is brewing or you have a difficult relationship with a co-worker, address it at the source before the problem gets bigger. If you feel that a team member is not pulling his weight, voice your concerns to him and state your expectations. Keep your tone calm and professional, and give him time to explain his perspective. Through direct communication, you may discover that the real problem is that he doesn’t understand his role, or that he’s wearing too many hats in the organization. Confronting the communication difficulty directly is one of the quickest ways to create good working relationships.
By adopting these daily habits, you’ll increase your coworkers’ respect and confidence in you. . Fortunately, they’re called “habits” for a reason—as you start doing these things on a daily basis, you’ll naturally remember to do them in more situations and with more of the people you encounter.
Try using at least two of these habits per day for the next week. Take notes on how people respond, and email Joel with follow-up questions about your results.